Renowned Sex Therapist Dr. Ruth Dead At 96

Radio and television personality and the woman who made sex therapy mainstream, Dr. Ruth Westheimer, died on Friday, July 12, 2024, at the age of 96 (via The New York Times). Dr. Ruth was one of the first people to provide frank, stigma-free sexual advice to the American public and became famous at the age of 52 when she began her radio talk show, "Sexually Speaking." 

Born Karola Ruth Siegel in Frankfurt, Germany on June 4, 1928, she was a "curious and inquisitive child," per Biography, who often snuck into her father's study to read about a variety of topics, including human sexuality. In 1933, her world was literally shattered by Kristallnacht, a Nazi pogrom targeting German Jews, and the kidnapping of her father by the SS.

The rest of the Siegels left Germany; Ruth was sent to a school in Switzerland and tragically never saw her family again — she suspected her family perished in a concentration camp. Her school eventually transitioned into a home for Jewish refugee girls. Unfortunately, her time at this school was not a happy one, but she did enjoy sharing information on topics that were taboo at the time, such as menstruation.

After World War II, she emigrated to Israel, followed by Palestine. She met and married an Israeli soldier in 1950 and they moved to Paris, France, where she studied psychology at the Sorbonne.

Ruth's first marriage ended and her husband returned to Israel, according to Biography. After receiving a restitution check from the German government, she sailed to New York with her French boyfriend; she had a scholarship waiting for her at the New School for Social Research. She and the boyfriend married, had a baby girl named Miriam, and divorced. Ruth worked as a maid during the day and took classes in English and Psychology at night, eventually graduating with a Master's in sociology. She then worked as a research assistant at Columbia University. In 1961 she went on a ski vacation and met and fell in love with a fellow Jewish refugee, Manfred Westheimer. They married and had a son, Joel.

In the 1960s, Westheimer worked at Planned Parenthood, where she found herself participating in lots of frank discussions about sex. She simultaneously worked toward her doctorate in family and sex counseling and eventually graduated and became an associate professor of sex counseling at Lehman College. She later moved to another job at Brooklyn College, but was soon fired, which reportedly made her feel "as I did when I got kicked out of Germany. Angry, helpless, rejected." 

However, the best was about to come. A lecture that she gave to New York broadcasters about the importance of sex education programming caught the attention of a producer at WYNY-FM. Westheimer was hired at $25 per week to record a 15-minute long sex advice show, "Sexually Speaking," that aired Sunday nights just after midnight. 

"Sexually Speaking" was an instant hit and expanded to a one-hour time slot to allow listeners to call in and ask questions. People loved talking with Dr. Ruth; her humor, wit, and charm made it easier to frankly talk about subjects that often caused discomfort or shame. In a 2019 article in The Guardian, the reporter theorized that this was "thanks to her unmistakable accent" which Westheimer called "a combination of the German, the Hebrew, the Swiss, the French, and that accent helped because as soon as people heard it they knew it was me." The article also notes that "it's hard to feel indignant or vexed when the person dishing advice on erectile dysfunction is a 90-year-old Jewish lady with long rolling R's and a Munchkin giggle."

"Sexually Speaking" was syndicated nationally in 1984 and Dr. Ruth became a household name. In addition to her radio show, she wrote newspaper columns, a column in "Playgirl" magazine, and starred in the Lifetime TV series, "Good Sex! With Dr. Ruth Westheimer." She was a frequent and popular guest on late night talk shows like "The Tonight Show" and "The Late Show" and made cameo appearances in TV and movies. She published several books, including "Dr. Ruth's Guide to Good Sex", "Sex For Dummies," and an autobiography, "All in a Lifetime," and launched her website in 1996, featuring advice, tips, and articles. She was the subject of the 2019 documentary "Ask Dr. Ruth." Her husband predeceased her in 1997. She is survived by her children and grandchildren.