What Archaeologists Really Think Of Ancient Aliens

The History Channel's smash hit program Ancient Aliens has either been around for roughly a decade, or, alternatively, was created eons ago by visitors from another world, if you subscribe to the ancient aliens theory of Ancient Aliens. Since its arrival, the show has become a cultural phenomenon, spawning merchandise, memes, a mobile game, more memes, and a permeating awareness of the hairstyle known as the "Toddler Got Into The Mousse Again." On an episode-by-episode basis, Ancient Aliens posits that everything from the Kennedy assassination to Tenochtitlan was developed less through mankind's dreadful will and more via beings from beyond the stars making field trips to Earth so they could poke the evolutionary bear, nudging the human race in one direction or another.

The series enlists the expertise of individuals from all across the half-a-bubble-off-plum spectrum, including plagiarists, con artists, and ex-bodybuilding promoters. But what do mainstream archaeologists think of the theories being rattled off through the world's TV screens week after week? It's complicated, but let's try to get into it.

So maybe it's not that complicated.

Look, in many situations, it can be dangerous to oversimplify and paint the opinions of an entire field of professionals with a single broad stroke. This isn't one of those times. The vast majority of scientists who specialize in studying human history think that Ancient Aliens exists within the field of higher learning best left in bong-fueled freshman dorm room symposiums. There are dozens of well researched articles and documentaries scattered across the internet, created by mainstream (by which we mean "actual") archaeologists on subjects that the show has flailed at over the years, like how extraterrestrials built the pyramids or gave us Dropbox. 

Are there holdouts? Sure. In any community, there are going to be some far out thinkers, hypothesizing in the face of physical evidence and logic. There are probably still doctors who don't think smoking is bad for you, too. Generally speaking, though, those aren't the doctors you want to go to. You want to go to the doctors who learned how to perform surgery from aliens. Like on the show.